‘Twas the Night Before Christmas

‘Twas the Night Before Christmas

T’was the night before Christmas and I sat glued to the telly,
An eggnog in one hand and shortbread in my belly.

The stockings were hung on the treadmill with cheer,
Thrilled that it was used to hang laundry this year.

I sat all night long; to the TV I was addicted,
While my blood sugar spiked and my arteries constricted.

To the kitchen I sauntered for one more late night snack,
But first popped two pills for my weak aching back.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I turned from the fridge to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I trotted at speed,  
My heart rate did quicken; a rest I would need.

While panting I realized my condition severe,
Out the window I saw a sleigh and eight strapping reindeer.

With a muscular driver, so agile and quick,
I could be mistaken- but it resembled a healthy St. Nick.

”Ho ho ho” he exclaimed as his biceps were flexing,
Last year he was rounder, and I found this perplexing.

He was dressed in synthetics, from this head to his foot,
A belt circled his toned waist so his pants would stay put.

Two twenty pound dumbbells he carried with ease,
As I ran to go greet him my hamstrings did seize.

His arms- how they rippled! His abs so defined!
And I couldn’t help but notice his perky behind!

Santa looked at me with concern in his eyes,
My lack of fitness clearly caused some surprise.

St. Nick had then asked “where is your motivation?
You need to not always give into temptation.

Exercise and portion control are key to staying fit,
A treat here and there won’t harm you one bit.

If you are not sure of what fitness program to approach,
Then do your body a favour and hire a great fitness coach”

Before he walked out he turned with a wink,
Santa had inspired me and caused me to think.

Getting fit may not be easy, small steps will do fine,
No more super-sized portions and only one glass of wine.

I looked out the window and watched Santa leave,
I now had a great goal I would work to achieve.

As I walked to my room and crawled into bed,
Visions of active living danced in my head.

I dozed off to sleep, tomorrow a new day,
I knew that big changes were coming my way.

Out in the distance I heard Santa call:
”This Christmas your health is the best gift of all!”